Breaking News: Dark Horses decided to remain Dark

In the dying hours of the run-up to the JMC, dark horses Team Miscellenia have allegedly suffered from a bout of low morale. Plagued by rumours of struggles over the team captaincy, the lack of a coherent strategy, and a hastily-assembled, patchwork team, the team issued a press release just before press time, stating that they have drastically altered their JMC strategy and expectations. They declared that while they remained committed to playing to the best of their ability in the best traditions of Miscellenia, they be satisfied if they finish third last in the heavily contested Memorial Cup.

Miscellenia fans are stricken at the announcements, and female fans have expressed indignance that 'the strapping lads from Miscellenia should bow down before the rest of the ugly shits in the Cup'. As of press time, the other teams have yet to make a public response to Team Miscellenia's change of plans.

In a related piece of news, the managers of Team 2I and 2K were spotted entering a house of ill repute in Desker Road. The Cup organisers are deeply concerned and promised to launch an extensive investigation and to punish any unprofessional behaviour.